We only live once

and life is too short to go at a slow pace

Hello dear friends, i hope you’re all doing fine. Somehow the algorithm, in these past days, put a lot of you in touch with my art (namely my ‘yellow house’, omg i can’t believe that i hit 1,000 ❤️ in one note) and some of you subscribed my ‘leaf’. Thank you so much for being here, this just means that you were touched by my art and that means the world to me. Welcome to you all! I am not teaching anything, i am sharing my work, my thoughts, my struggles, in a real illustrator life. I hope you can share your thoughts here too. More human sensitivity, the world needs that 😊

Why ‘tiny’ houses are something so special? I think it’s because they’re often seen as a refugee, that provide us with serenity, solitude and connection to nature. I’ve been painting them (6x6 cm) and it has been a delight.

Well, the last ‘leaf’ was in February. What happened in these past 3 months?

Perhaps I should go back further. I recall what I wrote in the June ‘leaf’ of last year:

“Lately I've been feeling like I don't have time for anything. I've gone back to working part-time and no matter how organized I am, time doesn't stretch. I like the fact that I have a job with a fixed income at the end of the month, because one of the things I struggled the most was the instability of this area. I don't regret it, because it gives me more mental clarity and more security. And if I have to take two steps back to take one more secure step forward, that's not what keeps me up at night.”

I tried to balance both things, illustration and a part-time work. But in May of this year, I decided to leave. I’ve only spoken to one person about what led me to make this decision. Now I’m sharing it with you, taking the opportunity to reflect on it.

Of course, the salary from this job gave me stability. But with that stability came a lack of time to paint and invest in illustration, a feeling that I wasn’t progressing, and I found myself wondering what I was doing. It’s as if I was stagnant, stuck, unable to take a step forward. And if it’s going to be like that, what’s the point? If my heart felt a pang every time I wanted to move forward with something and couldn’t? I felt my inner artist slowly dying. And it was with fear that I made the decision, but between remaining stagnant (waiting to achieve something slowly), and trying to live doing what I love, my heart spoke louder. It may be that in some time I come to the conclusion that I have to follow another path, but if that happens, it will be because I tried first. We only live once and life is too short to go at a slow pace.

In the last few days I’ve taken action. I can’t expect things to come to me; if they do, I’m grateful, but until then I have to seek them out. It’s a mindset I’ve been working on over the years, given that I’m quite a shy person, but I recognize my progress in that regard. So, hands on the brushes and planning into action. I don’t want to be someone who works and is an artist in their free time; I want to be a complete artist.

In the next “leaf”, I’ll share what I’ve been doing to advance my career. I hope you’ll stick around and leave a comment so we can exchange experiences. Tell me, have you ever make a decision with fear?

Stay well and enjoy life and nature,

Sandra 💚